you will not enjoy this post. i promise. it's not worth reading. if you think i am joking and trying to get your attention, you are wrong.

allow me to welcome back my trusty little apple ibook, who had been out of commission for over a month due to a charger failure and a lack of effort to secure a replacement. i couldn't see spending another $79 on a new one from apple, and all the off-brands received poor reviews. i eventually found one for pretty cheap that had minimal poor reviews... (you care).

with the return on the ibook comes a return of access to my itunes, and most importantly, my podcasts. for the past three days i have been marathoning every bill simmons podcast in my car as i drive around for work. i'm listening to football projections for week three of the nfl season and loving every minute of it. it's almost like i have travelled into the future, observed the outcomes of these games, and now get to go back to the past (present) and mock bill and cousin sal as they talk about what they suppose the outcomes of these future games to be. i have so much power, so much wisdom. if i could just call them and say, "you got it all wrong. trust me, i've been there, the patriots will lose to miami in week 4."

on another note, i preached a sermon to a lively bunch of senior citizens at madona manor today. my friend heather asked me to come once a week and hold a "non-denominational, protestant service" for all the non-catholics in the building. let me just tell you that i know nothing when it comes to the elderly. can i make jokes about bad cafeteria food and sponge baths? can i talk about death? i spoke about the subject of hope, and plan to continue this subject for several weeks, but every time i mentioned anything about death or life i felt like i was punching somebody in the kidney. i normally would fill a time of preaching with cultural references, personal experiences and well-planned analogies, but i quickly discovered that this would not fly with this crowd. a quick reference to the economic crisis brought about no reply, so i'm pretty sure these people don't really know what's going on. i'll keep trying though. next i'll try references to wheel of fortune and 'the jeffersons' reruns, with the hope that i can break through into their world. but i like old people. i get nervous around them, always have. even my own grandparents made me nervous, especially when they became sick and frail. i'm large and clumsy, and i think i have a fear that i will topple over some poor woman in the hall as she tries to scoot to the bathroom. one kind woman told me that i did a great job, but that it was too long. i love the honesty of the elderly, there's no more pulling punches when you get to that age. what you see is what you get. there's no time for pussy-footing around (what does that even mean? one of my favorite sayings of all time). so next week i'll trim down from a 40 minute presentation to a 20 minute, and hope that i can speak loudly and slowly enough that i don't lose everyone.

this thing is going nowhere. sorry, tried to write without a subject or goal in mind. i should probably just delete it, but i spent more than 6 minutes on it, and i don't waste that much time without some result. that and i feel compelled to average four posts a month on this blog. i'll be back with something worthwhile soon. i promise. (you care)